Spring Awakening

We're a few weeks out from spring. It feels much like an awakening, like a fresh start. I feel the way most do about new year's when spring rolls around. It feels like a rebirth. I remember feeling this way last year around this time. I think I wrote a post about it after not blogging for a few months because I let the stress of the colder months get to me as I did this year. But I couldn't be more excited for this spring. This spring is going to be so good.

Many days this winter were spent just trying to get by. The weather got to me, the stress of balancing work and school with family, friends, and a boyfriend who's only home on the weekends got to me. Even the stress of feeling like I was complaining too much about my life {which is such a lovely life especially in comparison to the true adversity others deal with} got to me because I would feel guilty but still felt like I had no where for the negative energy to go. 

I wanted to write a post where I could lay out my plans for spring. It helps maintain the excitement for what I hope is to come. Here are some exciting changes coming up:

// A new schedule 

I will be switching days when I have class and when I work so there will be "class days" and "work days" and I couldn't be more excited to not have to split my focus between work and school in the same 24 hours. 

With a new schedule comes all the possibilities for things I want to do to actually work. Like going to the gym, meal planning, writing, etc. With my days being so long I can only squeeze twenty minutes out to go to the gym. I can't keep lunches and healthy snacks cold {or hot} long enough to last me until dinner time which means I end up spending unnecessary money on meals near school because it's convenient and because I don't usually have the space in my already huge tote bag for anything more. I also don't have spare time to dedicate to meal planning and cooking like I would love to do. And writing for fun or for my own benefit? Forget it. After work and writing pieces for assignments in class I'm burned out. 

I can't wait to get into a routine where there will be more time available for me to do all these things. I'm being offered more hours at work which I can take on once winter quarter is over at school. I can have more face time in the office and spend more time in the gym after work {I use the gym in our building}. I can come home and have dinner with my family and actually see them. I'll even have more time to fit in some spontaneous writing, cooking, and reading. 

I'm a control freak and not having the realistic opportunity to organize my life and time in the way I would like to often drives me crazy and is the route of some of my stress so can I say it again? I.cant.wait.for.more.time.

// New space at work

A construction team is currently hammering away at the new space next door to our current office. My department will be moving into that space by the first week in April *fingers crossed*. This has been an on going conversation since October or November so we're all thrilled to finally get in there and make it our own. 

Part of the renovations have stemmed from needing more space to facilitate the expansion our company wants to make. There are going to be new hires within each department in the next year so we need more room for new faces! I currently sit in the back room/library because there wasn't a desk ready for me and because they knew a new space was on the horizon. But that means I don't currently have my own desk or computer {currently using a backup laptop}, so having my own space is going to be so, so good. I'm hoping to do a silly little "desk reveal" when I get everything the way I want it. I can't wait to decorate it for each season/holiday ;) 

{hoping I can add a lot of white with black and gold accents to my new space}

// Sammy updates

This spring will certainly bring many changes for Sammy's professional career. He's either destined to stay on the course he's currently on or he may be forced with a decision that could change everything he {and I} has been planning for. I'm behind him 100% either way but I would be lying if I said I wasn't secretly pining for one course over the other ;) Life is so good with him and I know whichever journey he takes will be for a reason and we'll make the best of it. 

{come on now. just one the loveliest sentiments}

This year has meant a lot of changes {good and bad} for myself and my family and I hope spring will allow for more understanding and acclimating to all those changes. I hope to come away with more peace about life and let go of the toxicity I let fester this winter.

In no way do I want this post to sound like I'm unappreciative for anything in my life. Even on the worst days I don't feel entitled to a new desk {as a new employee with hardly any experience I should have to work harder and prove myself} or an "easy" schedule {I'm entirely blessed to be a graduate student at such a wonderful university} or more free time {free time is the definition of luxury in my opinion and no one has enough of it so why should I?}. I've just spent the last two years in what has felt like a race to constantly keep everything together and this winter was the culmination of a lot of exhaustion, so even though I do not, in anyway, want to indulge myself in the notion of entitlement I'm just so taken with the idea of these changes finally surfacing. 

Google is telling me the first official day of spring is March 20th, but I started my celebrating on March 1st by swapping my flannel gray and white evergreen tree sheets for a solid turquoise jersey set. Maybe on the 20th I'll buy the all white set I saw at Target recently {something about white always seems so cleansing to me}. I usually throw on an old floral set I still have from my dorm days. They don't fit on my bed anymore but I love how the print looks like it's been painted right on the sheets. It reminds me of spring and growth. But then I think about what Miranda Priestly would say if she ever saw my bed: "Florals? For spring? Groundbreaking." So, I'll stick to white for now. It contains all the colors after all.
All the possibilities. 

xo